Hatchet

Stars: Joel Moore, Tamara Feldman, Mercedes McNab, Deon Richmond, Tony Todd

Director: Adam Green

Ed Wood lives! We know director Adam Green sees this horror film as a throwback, but we doubt he intended to go back this far. It's like an episode of the Friday the 13th series directed by one of the least adept Hollywood 'B' movie-makers of the 1940s.

Various members of the cast run screaming at the camera pursued by a deformed maniac (perennial movie monster Kane Hodder) who has already done for another horror icon in Robert Englund but, despite his giant legs, seems unable to keep up with our heroes until he pops up out of nowhere when they think they've outrun him. Otherwise, characters are placed carefully in his path with assurances that 'You'll be OK there'.

Our hideous villain roams the Lousiana swamplands after being accidentally 'killed' by his father, who pined away after several years (how could he not know that his son had survived?). When a tourist boat hits a rock, the bad guy has three nubile girls, a couple of nerds, the tour guide and a middle-aged couple to prey on. Much heart-ripping, jaw-snapping and head-breaking follows.

There's even a dated black comic relief who rolls his eyes and climbs a tree at the hint of danger. This further whiff of the 1940s may be intentional homage, but doesn't make the film any more exciting or less ridiculous.

The one star is for some atmospheric bayou photography by Will Barratt. But it's sad to see one-time sex symbol Patrika Darbo as a waddling, middle-aged harridan.

David Quinlan

USA 2006. UK Distributor: The Works. Colour.
84 minutes. Not widescreen. UK certificate: 18.

Guidance ratings (out of 3): Sex/nudity 1, Violence/Horror 3, Drugs 0, Swearing 1.

Review date: 02 Oct 2007