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Pyramid, The


Stars: Ashley Hinshaw, Denis O'Hare, James Buckley, Christa Nicola, Amir K, Faycal Attougui, Philip Shelley

Director: Gregory Levasseur

Horrorflicks are the cinema’s most enduring genre – and also the most abused in search of a quick buck, as anyone who has sat through sycophantic celebrations such as Frightfest, and similar obsequious acts of shock film worship, can confirm.

Curators of celluloid clichés are in for a real treat with this collection of familiar B-film shocker tropes served up in now over-familiar found footage form by screenwriters Nick Simon, Daniel Meersand and directed unmemorably and uninterestingly by Gregory Levasseur.

My bet is that Mummy would not admire it much.

We’re in sun-drenched Darkest Egypt yet again where, after scenes of rioting in contemporary Cairo and suitable shots underlining the setting, we join father-and-daughter archaeologists Denis O'Hare and Ashley Hinshaw in the desert where they are excavating a recently discovered and unique three-sided pyramid.

Before long (although it seemed longer), a lethal jet of poisonous gas has been released by the pyramid and the remote control camera cart borrowed from NASA’s Mars expeditions has vanished into the gloomy bowels of the structure. And so O’Hare, Hinshaw, reporter Christa Nicola and her British cameraman James Buckley boldly go where their agents should have warned them to avoid.

After which things go bump in the dark, sand pours in with lethal effects, death ensues and a monstrous long-dead ancient Egyptian god turns up to scratch faces and make life hell for the unfortunate interlopers before dispatching them…

To give the cast their due they keep commendably straight faces in the face of the dialogue and familiar shocks they are forced to confront. Character actor O’Hare sensibly sports a beard, presumably in order to avoid being recognized.

When someone states, “I’ve never seen anything like this” I could only assume they had never seen a horror movie. The remarks “This is the find of the century” an “This is all very interesting” are equally ridiculous in context.

Devout genre completists/addicts should get their money’s worth – providing they wait until The Pyramid turns up on television.

Verdict: Corn in Egypt.

Alan Frank

USA 2014. UK Distributor: 20th Century Fox. Colour.
89 minutes. Widescreen. UK certificate: 15.

Guidance ratings (out of 3): Sex/nudity 0, Violence/Horror 2, Drugs 3, Swearing 2.

Review date: 06 Dec 2014