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Cosmopolis (DQ)

3/10

Stars: Robert Pattinson, Samantha Morton, Sarah Gadon, Juliette Binoche, Mathieu Amalric, Kevin Durand, Paul Giamatti, Jay Baruchel, Emily Hampshire, Patricia McKenzie, Philip Nozuka

Director: David Cronenberg

This flaccid futuristic farrago is a long day's journey into night indeed. And almost all done in the back of a car.

As his stretch limo rumbles through a gridlocked city (Toronto standing in for New York), 20something Eric Packer (Pattinson), billionaire head of Packer capital, finds his fortune and his life slipping away.

Pausing for various conversations with geek employees, and sex (in and out of the limo) with acquaintances and (female) bodyguards, Packer grinds on towards his destiny ['We're speculating into the void,' one employee tells him, as the 'Yuan' currency soars impossibly high and Packer's stocks fall impossibly low] in a tortuous journey across the city against a background of riots led by poverty-stricken citizens.

Despite Cronenberg's efforts to enliven it, the film talks itself quite literally to death, as Packer assassinates his own (male) bodyguard (Durand) and finally reached his nemesis (Giamatti) who has been waiting for years to kill him.

Though based on a novel, the film runs like an off-off-Broadway play destined to run for about 10 days. Pattinson and Giamatti are both good, though you're not likely to care much what happens to them at the end.

'I didn't sleep last night,' complains Pattinson at one point. He should perhaps have tried watching this.

David Quinlan

Canada/France 2012. UK Distributor: Entertainment-One. Colour by deluxe.
110 minutes. Not widescreen. UK certificate: 15.

Guidance ratings (out of 3): Sex/nudity 2, Violence/Horror 1, Drugs 0, Swearing 1.

Review date: 12 Jun 2012